I hate Arbentags, it’s raining and there’s a maggot in my ale. I’m about to give the innkeeper a piece of my mind when a blood curdling scream cuts through the night. I grab Molly, my warhammer, and look about; the innkeeper is visibly shaking, he isn’t going to be much use so I head out into the night alone.
As I run into the village square I’m confronted by a motley assortment of people milling about a gruesome scene. I can see a Weismagir clinically inspecting the corpse of a man who has been brutally gutted while to the side a medical type is comforting a screaming woman. To their left an angular, pointy looking man is surveying the scene with a detached air of interest and just behind him is a shifty looking chap with a nasty pair of axes.
The head of the guard, Gregor, is wandering about, looking a bit overwhelmed so I head over to see if he needs help. He mumbles something about a church before shouting out ’You’ve got my back Odo’ and charging off into the center of village. Shifty sprints after him, they seem to be heading towards a church that is glowing an ominous green.
It’s going to be one of those nights.
I head after Gregor, he’s a decent sort and I doubt he’s equipped to deal with the sort of shit I suspect is ahead. I catch up to Shifty at the entrance to graveyard as he runs straight past me back out into the village. As I step forward I notice what looks to be Gregor’s decapitated body lying on the ground. Behind me I hear the other people from the square arrive and I become acutely aware Shifty is standing directly behind me.
I check my belt pouch is still there.
I hear someone whispering behind me (The Weismagir?) it seems she’s spotted something , as I strain my eyes three figures emerge from the darkness. To my left the world seems to warp slightly and one of the figures seems to partially explode in fountain of ichor then everything goes to hell in hand basket. There is magic flashing all around me and I seem to be fighting some freaky beardless Zwergen abomination who’s trying to take a bite out of Shifty. I charge forward only to find myself flipped into the air by something.
I don’t think anyone noticed but I try to look nonchalant anyway.
As I engage the last of the enemies Shifty starts rolling about in the graveyard fountain before leaping up and hacking the zombified beastie in front of me into mince meat, flicking some of the rancid flesh into my face in the process.
I’m not sure but I think he may have done that on purpose.
The Doc shouts that the woman’s children are hiding in one of the buildings, I go to tell them it’s safe to come out.
They don’t like me.
I leave the kids to the Doc when a racket breaks out on the other side of graveyard, Shifty and Pointy seem to have gotten in a fight with a tomb door. Shifty then climbs up on top of the tomb and we all hear an almighty crash and then nothing. Guess that’s him dead then.
Nope, after a while the tomb door creaks open and he steps out looking suspiciously blasé..
Tomb robbing not seeming like the most pressing issue at the moment I follow the Weismagir off towards the church. Shifty sprints ahead of us and then is abruptly knocked on his arse by something. After a bit of investigation by the more magically inclined it seems like the church is being protected by some sort of entropic force field.
Looking for another way in the Doc points out a nearby well filled with weird looking twitching vines. While we’re discussing what to do Shifty sticks his hand in the well, he screams and when he pulls his arm out its covered in a weird looking rash. He’ll probably want to get an ointment for that.
No one fancies going down the well after that so we start tossing stuff at the force field. Dead matter seems to interact with it weirdly and when the Doc tosses Gregor’s head at the field it suddenly un-rots into what is clearly not Gregor’s head. Wonder who the stiff at the gate was then?
The Doc puts some ointment on Shifty’s arm and abruptly pushes the arm into the forcefield. The arms sizzles and there is a smell of bacon in the air.
Note to self: Do note piss the Doc off before treatment.
Pointy has been staring intently at the church for ages, I go to prod him when a number of things happen all at once.
1. Someone lets one off, a really foul eggy smell fills the air.
2. Pointy vanishes
3. While I’m left pondering what the hell just happened, someone works out how to get through the forcefield and everyone charges forward towards the church leaving me lagging behind.
As I run after the others an agonizing scream rips through my head, it seems like it’s coming from inside me but from the dazed looks on the other’s faces I can tell they can hear it too.
I rush into the church, past Shifty, who is in the process of making kebabs out of the local bat population, and straight into a giant green plant-monster-thing. Pointy is on the other side of it, all around him the world seems to be warping and tearing as smaller plants monsters and whisp like beings are being shredded left right and center. The plant screams again but I’m ready for it this time, I start swinging and the madness of combat descends upon me again.
As the haze clears I realise I’ve been pummeling a dead plant for about ten minutes. I have a vague impression that the plant was spoking to me just before it died; it told me we could have been wonderful together but that seems a bit disturbing to contemplate so I turn to survey the aftermath.
The Doc is tending to Pointy and Shifty who are lying prone on the floor, they both look pretty battered. The Weismagir seems to have been busy I can see the remains of some of the smaller plant beasts being dragged into the shadows by dark and bloody claws. I look away, there are some things it’s better not to ask about.
The air turns sulfurous as some one lets one off again. I start to turn round to ask who did it this time when I see red smoke billowing out of the vegetable remains.
Shouting a warning I heft Molly into position, ready for another fight.